My legs does not work like they used to. The nerves are all messed up and I keep losing the sensation in them more and more frequently. I am in enough pain to be back on morphine, so I spent most of yesterday being trapped in eighteen hours of morphine nightmares. The bright spot in my life is that it seems like I have been wrongly informed about my options regarding the uterus, either because the doctor who informed me had no idea what she was talking about (concerning), or gave me the wrong information based on mistaking my age (which means reading my journal wrong/forgetting/not reading it, which is also concerning).
I am not having much confidence in the hospital right now.
I am not having much confidence in myself, either. I only want to curl up and cry, cry and cry, because everything hurts, and when something does not hurt it is because I cannot feel at all.